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Relationship and Marriage counseling can assist you find out how compatible you are.

The two most crucial factors that determine how similar you are as a couple are:

A similar level of psychological health and maturity and a similar ranking of Instinctual Variants.

What are Instinctual Variants?
The 3 Instincts represent the inherant energies or drives that are innately part of us as humans. Our personality is highly engaged with and is often dependent on these libidinal, instinctual energies to give it its spark.

Self Preservation Instinct.
People of this Instinctual variant are preoccupied with the basic survival needs as they translate into our contemporary society, for example, finance, food, housing, health, safety and comfort.
Being safe and physically comfortable are essential, and they will often bring these supplies with them.
When entering a room, they will tend to notice bad lighting, uncomfortable chairs, the room temperature, when the coffee break will be, and whether they will like the food provided. They also tend to be the most practical in the sense of taking care of important life necessities.
They are the most introverted of the types.

Sexual/ Intimate Instinct.
People of this type have a strong desire for intensity of experience and affection. The blunt riveting gaze is the dead giveaway. When they enter a situation they gravitate toward people they feel magnetized to, as if they are looking for the juice. These people can turn into intimacy junkies, often neglecting pressing matters or even basic hygiene if they are swept up in something that has captivated them. This gives a wide ranging exploratory philosophy to life, but can also give a lack of focus on one’s own goals.

Social Instinct.
People of this type are focused on their interactions with others and with the sense of value and esteem they derive from their participation in collective activities. These include work, family, side activities and clubs.
Upon entering a room, these people would immediately be aware of the power structures and subtle politics between different people and social circles. They are subconsciously attuned on other’s reaction to them, particularly about whether they are being accepted or not.
They need to interact with others to feel secure, alive and energised. They seem to live for interacting with people, but they avoid intimacy.
They are the most extroverted of the types.

Within a person, one of these three Instincts will predominate. In fact these 3 variants can be ranked like the sections of a cake, with the most dominant one at the top. The weakest one, at the bottom, is termed the blind spot.
These inherent instincts play an important role in our relationships because people of the same variant tend to share values and understand each other completely, and therefore feel very compatible.

In relationships between 2 different Instinctual types, each will struggle to convert the other.

For further information on discovering whether you and your partner are compatible, contact the Hart Centre Australia. We are Australia’s premier relationship and marriage counselling service with 53 locations Australia wide, and 8 relationship counselling centres in Brisbane, 3 marriage counselling centres in the Gold Coast, and 2 relationship counselling locations on the Sunshine Coast. Phone 1300 830 552 for appointments at all centres.

For relationship counselling Brisbane, marriage counselling gold coast and marriage counselling sunshine coast, contact your local Hart Centre.